marginalia | fic: retrace the stars. aubrey/maturin

title: retrace the stars
pairing: aubrey/maturin
archive: .: marginalia :.
disclaimer: i own nothing. o'brian is spinning in his grave.
notes: for

starfishchick's birthday, oh so belatedly. unbeta-ed, so if there's anything glaring, by all means let me know. considering how much of it was written after 2am, i imagine there -are- things :)

The wind has shifted; now it blows across
our path and rises from the black west, now
the air has thickened into mist. We cannot
hold out against it, cannot keep on course.
Since Fortune has the better of us now,
Let us obey and turn aside where she
has called. I think the faithful shores of Eryx,
your brother, and Sicilian ports are not
far off, if only I remember right
and can retrace the stars I watched before.

Virgil, The Aeneid, trans. by Allen Mandelbaum

A modern translation, naturally. Stephen had memorized The Aeneid in Latin.

The Surprise was a world unto itself, suffering weather and winds both below and above deck. Moods would swirl through the men, fogs shifting through the carefully balanced relationships, the reliable order, the ritual of daily life.

Their time at sea lengthy, his access to resources uncertain, Stephen took to rationing his stores of opium, limiting the nights when the laudanum would ensure dreamless sleep. When battle the next day was certain, he dared not risk his level of alertness for his patients, but when the sea was calm he allowed Morpheus to come as he would.

Some nights he gave himself over to tossing and turning - the suspended cots had never been what one might classify as comfortable - some nights he read, wrote, or just lay back and let his mind race on, unchecked, longing for it to tire itself to match his weary body.

Rare nights he would find himself above deck, almost without intending it. He'd nod to Bonden at the wheel (whose voice would falter at the interruption, but whose song would continue once he knew it was just the Doctor), button his coat higher against the cold, then move towards the fo'c'sle, find a spot at the rail, chin resting on folded arms, gazing unseeing into the dark.

Tonight the Surprise hung in the water. The sea spread around him, time rushing around a single point. Jack appeared beside him, an unmistakable presence, warm and solid in the diaphanous night. "Plotting our route, my dear?" he asked.

Stephen shook the mist from his brain. "Not at all." He glanced upwards. "What stories they could tell. They lead men from one end of the earth to another, and yet." Stephen stopped. And yet there is no such chart for the span of men's hearts. Stephen straightened and clasped his hands to the rail. "Perhaps I could trouble you to tell me sometime of those instruments for reading in the stars something beyond myth."

"It would bring me great joy. I have been remiss in not offering before. Your insatiable curiosity is most inspiring." Jack smiled as Stephen ducked his head briefly, and then he braved the distance, sliding his hand over Stephen's.

They stood in companionable silence for time unknown, listening to the sea and the coxswain. Bonden dropped into a hum, but it carried sweet across the deck in the still air. Jack's hand lay heavy and warm on Stephen's. He squeezed it once, warming Stephen's slim fingers with his great paw, then withdrew, placing his hands at the small of his back.

"I should think we'll see land soon," Jack said. "A friendly port. We shall refit and resupply."

"Very good," Stephen said.

Jack hesitated, caught in a rare moment of uncertainty. "I should be going below now. You ought as well - there is quite a chill on the air tonight."

The world held its breath, but the winds kept on, Fortune-driven, strong and sure. "You are advising me in matters of health, my dear Captain?" Stephen's lips quirked. "Nonetheless, I shall follow. In a moment."

Jack stepped away, and Stephen turned back to the sea and the stars.

(also posted here)

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

Jack smiled as Stephen ducked his head briefly, and then he braved the distance, sliding his hand over Stephen's.

He squeezed it once, warming Stephen's slim fingers with his great paw

I have no idea why this line gets me like it does.. but oh Jaci.. my heart..

excuse me while I go read this a few dozen more times...

my dear captain, your response gives me great joy :)

Gah, yes. Understated, intimate, and saying so much with simple grace. Yes. Love it.

*insert immature squee for singing!Bonden here*

whee! thank you.

see, the thing is i'm a sucker for music in general. so whenever i can get it into fic, oh yes, i am -all- over that. and with bonden it just felt -right-, you know?

<3

This is really exquisite. I love how the air and fog imagery weaves throughout the story, the literal mists of people's moods and the mist of Stephen's brain, the wind and the breeze and the cold night air. And on top of, like the high note in a harmony, Bonden's voice. This piece has so much texture.

Jack appeared beside him, an unmistakable presence, warm and solid in the diaphanous night. Gah, "the diaphonous night." Wish I had written that.

the electronic merriam-webster is my best friend, i tell you :)

i'm just so glad it -worked-. i always find myself writing dense pieces rather than stories of length, so it is lovely to get feedback like this, to know that it's ok, i guess. thank you!

*wriggles with pleasure* Oh, that was just too delicious...

eee! thank you :)

Tonight the Surprise hung in the water. The sea spread around him, time rushing around a single point. Jack appeared beside him, an unmistakable presence, warm and solid in the diaphanous night. "Plotting our route, my dear?" he asked.

The lanuage, the images, the "following"! *dies against Jaci's wishes*

omg no death there are rules eep!

<3

*reluctantly come back to life for Jaci's birthday*

hey! whaddid I miss?

*sadly* the porn. sorry!

DID YOU SEE WHAT RENITA WROTE?
OMG!
HOT!

Mmm, beautiful. You have a real gift for description that's nearly tactile, if that makes sense.

it does! and that's absolutely lovely to hear. thank you!

This is so lovely... just... I can feel the air around it, if that makes sense. Everything is so clear and so beautifully drawn. It's like a painting that has captured the true essence of its subject and the world around it. I have never seen the movie or read the book (there's a book, right?), but I can see this so clearly, it's as if I was there.

They stood in companionable silence for time unknown, listening to the sea and the coxswain. Bonden dropped into a hum, but it carried sweet across the deck in the still air. Jack's hand lay heavy and warm on Stephen's. He squeezed it once, warming Stephen's slim fingers with his great paw, then withdrew, placing his hands at the small of his back.

That was just the most beautiful moment ever.

some nights he read, wrote, or just lay back and let his mind race on, unchecked, longing for it to tire itself to match his weary body.

That... what a perfect way to describe it. I'm awed. This is gorgeous, my dear friend.

thank you, my precious, my love! and hey, unlike the ghost world fic, my m&c stuff doesn't have spoilers. (there are actually something like twenty books (!!) i've only read the first one so far, though, but it was fantastic.)

*loves on you for following me into all of these strange fandoms*

Hi! I came from

frulie's and I just wanted to wish you

*throws confetti and flowers* ^_^

yay! thank you :)

I read this on Saturday (did you get my email?) but LJ was not letting me post comments. Tricksy thing.

What I had written was this:

*long, trembling exhalation*

Jeebus, Jaci, this is amazing. Beautiful, gorgeous,
these words are not enough to describe this. I am
honest-to-Pete TRANSFIXED by it.

some nights he read, wrote, or just lay back and let
his mind race on, unchecked, longing for it to tire
itself to match his weary body.

I know this feeling.

Jack appeared beside him, an unmistakable presence,
warm and solid in the diaphanous night.

"diaphanous night" = What a gorgeous phrase.

"What stories they could tell. They lead men from
one end of the earth to another, and yet." Stephen
stopped. And yet there is no such chart for the span of
men's hearts.

Oh oh oh.

Stephen straightened and clasped his hands to the
rail. "Perhaps I could trouble you to tell me sometime
of those instruments for reading in the stars something
beyond myth."

What a grasp of their way of speaking - this is totally
believable.

Jack's hand lay heavy and warm on Stephen's. He
squeezed it once, warming Stephen's slim fingers with
his great paw, then withdrew

What a beautiful image.

Jack hesitated, caught in a rare moment of
uncertainty. "I should be going below now. You ought as
well - there is quite a chill on the air tonight."

The world held its breath, but the winds kept on,
Fortune-driven, strong and sure. "You are advising me
in matters of health, my dear Captain?" Stephen's lips
quirked. "Nonetheless, I shall follow. In a moment."

Jack stepped away, and Stephen turned back to the sea
and the stars.

I love this. Love it love it love it. Jack's
uncertainty, in a world where he is above all certain.

And this sentence: The world held its breath, but
the winds kept on, Fortune-driven, strong and sure.

What a great birthday present - I only hope I can be
worthy of it.

*loves on you big-time*

(i -had- gotten the email, and for that i thank you - it set my mind at ease :) but i have just been so busy - and often away from the computer - that i had been terrible about responding.)

i'm especially grateful for the comment on the voices. it -is- a tricky pattern to get down, so i am very glad that they sounded true to you.

<3

fic: retrace the stars. aubrey/maturin

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Beautiful! (really)

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Re: Beautiful! (really)

Re: Beautiful! (really)

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