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marginalia) wrote2004-06-10 02:03 am
marginalia) wrote2004-06-10 02:03 am
Entry tags:
fic: leave you black and blue. remus/sirius. marauder rhombus au.
[leave you black and blue] - remus/sirius. au.
the much anticipated (ha!) part three of remus's pov on the patience arc. marauder rhombus alternate universe. the original story is symptoms of touring. finally, the most important note of all, for![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
offscreen. unbetaed, so holler and i shall fix.
Remus kept forgetting what town they were in, but as it wasn't his job to yell "How are you feeling tonight, Ingary?" he decided not to worry about it. Tonight he had enough to think about. James was half naked on stage and Remus was busy not watching Sirius, because he'd rather not know if Sirius was watching James writhe against the mic stand or the drummer from the opening band matching him move for move at the front of the stage.
The crowd was screaming and it was just one of those nights, so Remus let the energy wash over him until the show ended and the girls with the signs and the hearts descended on them at the bar. Well, maybe they didn't have signs. But they were definitely the type, and if the band was playing another night here there would be girls in glitter and tight tops all out there sparkling, catching Sirius's eye, making him toss his hair and smile, because he knew, he fucking knew.
There were enough girls as it is; the opening band seemed to have drawn half of the town's underage females and Remus thought that if bookings were up to him there would be no more all-ages shows. Of course, that would just be delaying the inevitable.
Remus definitely was not watching Sirius brushing elbows with James as they signed fliers after the show for girls wearing not enough clothes and too much hairspray. He was standing back in the shadows, smoking, because he felt like he should be there, but the noise was getting to be too much. He was pleased to see Peter talking to a girl with spiky hair, but he didn't have the heart to tell him that she was probably not terribly interested in boys. For one passive-aggressive moment he considered fleeing to the motel and bed, but that just screamed drama, and Remus did not scream.
He was about to light another cigarette when the bass player from the opening band approached. "Dana," she said, presenting her hand.
"Remus," he answered, taking it, and was surprised to be pulled into a quick hug, a real hug, with her rising on tiptoe, meeting him cheek to cheek, with her breasts pressed tight to his chest, not the awkward A-frame hug his girl cousins tended to give but a hug like she meant it.
She bummed a cigarette, and quickly distracted him with conversation about the bass, about the crowd, and about their respective bands. "Are you hungry?" she said, out of the blue. Then, off his look, "That's not a line. It's just, I have the car, I'm kind of tired of being here, and when we have late shows my mum keeps dinner warm for me. Besides," she glanced at her feet. "She's probably still waiting up to hear how the show went."
Remus laughed. "They probably won't notice I'm missing til one. But don't you think this is a little fast, meeting the parents?" She answered him with a swat on the arm, and then she was tugging him towards the exit. There was plenty of room in the backseat for their basses, and she drove with the cautiousness of a recent license. He had a clear image of her mother already, from the sedan itself to the "Thank You For Not Smoking" sign glued to the dashboard, and when they arrived at the house he was almost afraid to follow her up the steps.
He needn't have worried. Dana's mum hugged him tight, set him down at the table, and asked nothing of him but that he eat. She and Dana filled the room with conversation, and it was such a refreshing change, family and real food and no demands, that he was finally able to relax in a way he hadn't since the tour began. When Dana's mother said goodnight, Remus thanked her for dinner. "A homecooked meal, you have no idea."
"Not at all. I can just imagine you poor boys, living on breathmints and takeaway," she squeezed his shoulders affectionately and looked pointedly at Dana. "Don't stay up too late, dear."
After she disappeared upstairs, Dana looked at him carefully. "If you were one of my girlfriends, I'd sit you down and do your makeup and make you tell me all about that guitarist." She tilted her head, inspecting him. "You'd be stunning with eyeliner. But somehow I think that trick doesn't work with boys. More's the pity. You have a scar," she added in quite a different tone of voice, brushing his hair away from his forehead.
"Barfight," he answered truthfully.
"I bet you tell that to all the girls." She offered him a ride back to the motel, but he told her to drop him off a few blocks early. She gave him her phone number and a peck on the cheek. "I know you won't call," she said, "But I'd like to know how it turns out."
Remus raised his hand in a brief wave as she drove away, and then walked towards the motel, thinking about distance and bridging it and the glitter that somehow ended up everywhere. The bedside lamp was still on in their room when he opened the door - using Sirius's trick with the handle - and James and Peter were asleep.
Sirius was sitting at the foot of the bed, blinking up at Remus, still half asleep. Remus stopped in front of him, leaned in to tell him, "You should have taken the bed, Sirius." It felt brave in the half-light, like getting Sirius into the bed would be one step. One change. But Sirius reached for his wrist before he could speak, fingerprints burning into Remus's skin, and whispersang a serenade, "And I can't help thinking that it might be, / I might be / In love..."
Remus froze. It was a leap, it was all wrong, it was a trap and if he said the wrong thing James and Peter would be awake and laughing and. He felt ill. He cast around and saw the empty bottle, flung drunk in Sirius's face in self-defense, and took the bed as Sirius lay down on the floor.
Remus's lies were always wishes, and maybe if he said it enough, said that Sirius was drunk and didn't know what he was singing . .or to who . .then it would be all right. Sirius burned too bright, and Remus was drawn to the flame, hovering outside and avoiding destruction.
The words were too sharp, so he threw a pillow down to Sirius to soften them, then lit a cigarette and waited for morning.
author's notes:
first, please forgive the appalling puns in the title. i've been taking the titles from the same songs kathleen chose, and from as near the same lyrics as possible. and i just couldn't resist.
when this 'verse was rec'ed . . .somewhere . . .there was a criticism that it didn’t carry 70s detail. after reading that i thought about doing some research to add timeline detail to this part, but i honestly preferred it feeling more timeless. and then reviewing the author's notes i remembered why i had avoided that kind of detail before - because that was intentional. so there.
the soundtrack for this is, unsurprisingly, rufus wainwright's poses, wilco's yankee hotel foxtrot, and the old 97s satellite rides.
this really surprised me. until two hours ago, i was convinced that dana had taken him out clubbing and he had made out with some adonis on the dance floor. but dana was like, "no, actually, he needs food and a friend and maybe a mom voice." and who was i to argue?
the much anticipated (ha!) part three of remus's pov on the patience arc. marauder rhombus alternate universe. the original story is symptoms of touring. finally, the most important note of all, for
offscreen. unbetaed, so holler and i shall fix.Remus kept forgetting what town they were in, but as it wasn't his job to yell "How are you feeling tonight, Ingary?" he decided not to worry about it. Tonight he had enough to think about. James was half naked on stage and Remus was busy not watching Sirius, because he'd rather not know if Sirius was watching James writhe against the mic stand or the drummer from the opening band matching him move for move at the front of the stage.
The crowd was screaming and it was just one of those nights, so Remus let the energy wash over him until the show ended and the girls with the signs and the hearts descended on them at the bar. Well, maybe they didn't have signs. But they were definitely the type, and if the band was playing another night here there would be girls in glitter and tight tops all out there sparkling, catching Sirius's eye, making him toss his hair and smile, because he knew, he fucking knew.
There were enough girls as it is; the opening band seemed to have drawn half of the town's underage females and Remus thought that if bookings were up to him there would be no more all-ages shows. Of course, that would just be delaying the inevitable.
Remus definitely was not watching Sirius brushing elbows with James as they signed fliers after the show for girls wearing not enough clothes and too much hairspray. He was standing back in the shadows, smoking, because he felt like he should be there, but the noise was getting to be too much. He was pleased to see Peter talking to a girl with spiky hair, but he didn't have the heart to tell him that she was probably not terribly interested in boys. For one passive-aggressive moment he considered fleeing to the motel and bed, but that just screamed drama, and Remus did not scream.
He was about to light another cigarette when the bass player from the opening band approached. "Dana," she said, presenting her hand.
"Remus," he answered, taking it, and was surprised to be pulled into a quick hug, a real hug, with her rising on tiptoe, meeting him cheek to cheek, with her breasts pressed tight to his chest, not the awkward A-frame hug his girl cousins tended to give but a hug like she meant it.
She bummed a cigarette, and quickly distracted him with conversation about the bass, about the crowd, and about their respective bands. "Are you hungry?" she said, out of the blue. Then, off his look, "That's not a line. It's just, I have the car, I'm kind of tired of being here, and when we have late shows my mum keeps dinner warm for me. Besides," she glanced at her feet. "She's probably still waiting up to hear how the show went."
Remus laughed. "They probably won't notice I'm missing til one. But don't you think this is a little fast, meeting the parents?" She answered him with a swat on the arm, and then she was tugging him towards the exit. There was plenty of room in the backseat for their basses, and she drove with the cautiousness of a recent license. He had a clear image of her mother already, from the sedan itself to the "Thank You For Not Smoking" sign glued to the dashboard, and when they arrived at the house he was almost afraid to follow her up the steps.
He needn't have worried. Dana's mum hugged him tight, set him down at the table, and asked nothing of him but that he eat. She and Dana filled the room with conversation, and it was such a refreshing change, family and real food and no demands, that he was finally able to relax in a way he hadn't since the tour began. When Dana's mother said goodnight, Remus thanked her for dinner. "A homecooked meal, you have no idea."
"Not at all. I can just imagine you poor boys, living on breathmints and takeaway," she squeezed his shoulders affectionately and looked pointedly at Dana. "Don't stay up too late, dear."
After she disappeared upstairs, Dana looked at him carefully. "If you were one of my girlfriends, I'd sit you down and do your makeup and make you tell me all about that guitarist." She tilted her head, inspecting him. "You'd be stunning with eyeliner. But somehow I think that trick doesn't work with boys. More's the pity. You have a scar," she added in quite a different tone of voice, brushing his hair away from his forehead.
"Barfight," he answered truthfully.
"I bet you tell that to all the girls." She offered him a ride back to the motel, but he told her to drop him off a few blocks early. She gave him her phone number and a peck on the cheek. "I know you won't call," she said, "But I'd like to know how it turns out."
Remus raised his hand in a brief wave as she drove away, and then walked towards the motel, thinking about distance and bridging it and the glitter that somehow ended up everywhere. The bedside lamp was still on in their room when he opened the door - using Sirius's trick with the handle - and James and Peter were asleep.
Sirius was sitting at the foot of the bed, blinking up at Remus, still half asleep. Remus stopped in front of him, leaned in to tell him, "You should have taken the bed, Sirius." It felt brave in the half-light, like getting Sirius into the bed would be one step. One change. But Sirius reached for his wrist before he could speak, fingerprints burning into Remus's skin, and whispersang a serenade, "And I can't help thinking that it might be, / I might be / In love..."
Remus froze. It was a leap, it was all wrong, it was a trap and if he said the wrong thing James and Peter would be awake and laughing and. He felt ill. He cast around and saw the empty bottle, flung drunk in Sirius's face in self-defense, and took the bed as Sirius lay down on the floor.
Remus's lies were always wishes, and maybe if he said it enough, said that Sirius was drunk and didn't know what he was singing . .or to who . .then it would be all right. Sirius burned too bright, and Remus was drawn to the flame, hovering outside and avoiding destruction.
The words were too sharp, so he threw a pillow down to Sirius to soften them, then lit a cigarette and waited for morning.
author's notes:
first, please forgive the appalling puns in the title. i've been taking the titles from the same songs kathleen chose, and from as near the same lyrics as possible. and i just couldn't resist.
when this 'verse was rec'ed . . .somewhere . . .there was a criticism that it didn’t carry 70s detail. after reading that i thought about doing some research to add timeline detail to this part, but i honestly preferred it feeling more timeless. and then reviewing the author's notes i remembered why i had avoided that kind of detail before - because that was intentional. so there.
the soundtrack for this is, unsurprisingly, rufus wainwright's poses, wilco's yankee hotel foxtrot, and the old 97s satellite rides.
this really surprised me. until two hours ago, i was convinced that dana had taken him out clubbing and he had made out with some adonis on the dance floor. but dana was like, "no, actually, he needs food and a friend and maybe a mom voice." and who was i to argue?
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*\o/*
*worships, adores*
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*dies*
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well, the opening line was just great. Musicians (and Spinal Tap fans) will adore you for it! *squeeze*
I liked your choice to play 'open' with the time. The images were so clear, that it really didn't need any dates for the story to make sense to me.
This line was stunning:
She gave him her phone number and a peck on the cheek. "I know you won't call," she said, "But I'd like to know how it turns out."
I don't get to read a lot of AU, but I loved this.
oO A pimp-ing I will go...Oo
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well, it's a choice the original authors made, but i like it. besides, it spares us the potential horrors of 70s fashion :)
thanks, dear :)
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"Barfight,"
"I bet you tell that to all the girls." Because a girl WOULD say that sort of thing and Remus wouldn't be the type to lie like she teases him about and it's just so oddly poignant and cute to me somehow. Hah, excellent as always, and, once again, I'm sure Kathleen's gonna be ecstatic.
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and whispersang a serenade
that's just perfect, perfect phrasing. I'm tingling.
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GAH. I could read your work in this universe all day long and never tire of it. So frickin' beautiful. SO beautiful. GAH.
Funny, I was hearing Poses before I even read the author's note. :)
I love this so much.
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though i am batting away bunnies for a five things mr!s/r fic. oooh. :) can you au an au? the mind fairly boggles.
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I can *see* this.
And the end ... oh, my heart!
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i think i mary sue the hell out of remus. i'm pleased that it still works ;) thank you!
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now i can get to the less coherent part. this is so, so lovely. i think i've said to you before that i wrote symptoms having no idea where Remus was during it, and ever since you wrote those first Remus drabbles, it's been clear that you'd know better than me. i've never taken part in any of the various famdom remix projects, so your reworkings of the patience arc are my first experience with it, and it's fun (for me, as a spectator, who doesn't have to remix anyone else's fic in turn, haha). this is a scenario i don't think would have ever occured to me, and like the other Remus-POV things you've done, just works. seamlessly.
i love Dana as a character---the relationships between the boys (especially Remus and Sirius) are all so concerned with keeping up the right sort of appearance, so having Remus interact with someone who's actually sort of friendly and sincere brings out a different facet of him (something the "But don't you think this is a little fast, meeting the parents?" did a great job of illustrating---he's so relaxed and almost sociable! amazing.) and "I know you won't call," she said, "But I'd like to know how it turns out."? there's something so final and true and rhythmically nice about it.
It felt brave in the half-light, like getting Sirius into the bed would be one step. One change. ---is just a perfect (i've run out of adjectives already, haven't i?) train of thought for Remus, and i am strangely in love with how jarring and out-of-context Sirius's song is through Remus's eyes. the ending is so sharply aching in this lovely way, and such an awesome contrast with the ending of the storyline from Sirius's POV.
in short, (as always) <33333.
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and i do think the verse works better that way - it makes it more dream-like, for one, and dude, rock and roll is always rock and roll, no matter when it's set.
this was such an interesting one to do, because as i said in the notes, for months now i thought i knew where remus was, and then i sat down to write this and he had gone somewhere completely different. i love it when characters surprise me.
and so. yes. thank you :) am relieved, as always, to get your comments. now write more, mkay? :)