yiling matriarch (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
marginalia) wrote2004-08-10 05:13 am
marginalia) wrote2004-08-10 05:13 am
Entry tags:
fic: five things that never happened to the bass player. remus/sirius, but au-ed beyond recognition
[five things that never happened to the bass player] - remus/sirius. marauder rhombus 'verse. except not.
yeah. an au of an au. give me meta or give me death. this is mostly because the UST was starting to get to me. poor, pretty boys. yeah, i know i wasn't suppose to be writing this. i think this was more for me than it was for you folks. unbetaed, and as it's now 5am i'm damned sure there are errors. so yell.
i.
in the cathedrals of new york and rome
there is a feeling you should just go home
and spend a lifetime finding out just where that is.
They've arrived in town earlier than expected, and the buildings cast shadows all around them. James and Peter cast longing eyes in the direction of the motel and a nap, but Sirius's leg has been jumping for the last hour, so Remus takes pity on him and suggests the two of them take a walk.
There's not much town to walk through, and perhaps inevitably they wind up at the cemetery. They make jokes about death and romance, and then about nothing at all. "We could go in for a minute." Remus hesitates. "Only if you like, of course."
A side door is unlocked and they slide into a back pew. The air is thick with incense and confession. "I broke it off with Patrick," Remus says softly, apropos of nothing. He is looking straight ahead. "Before the tour started. Because it wasn't right with him. Because it wasn't fair to make him wait." Because he wasn't you. Sirius doesn't say anything, doesn't look at him, just nods once. "I just thought you should know," Remus says, leaves everything else hanging in the air.
Almost without realizing it, they each reach across the smooth wood and lace their fingers together. The oil angels and glass saints look down on them. For now, for here, it is enough.
ii.
james!
c'mon hold your horses
the first kid under your nose ain't a sure thing
Okay, so, fine. James had taken Sirius for granted. He supposed. Either that or he had been watching too many made for tv movies. Or both, if he was even using the term "taken for granted" in the first place.
What was astonishing was how long it took him to notice. He should have seen it right from the beginning, how Sirius fucking glowed after he went to the hotel lounge on Peter's suggestion. No new band members could be all that exciting, James was certain.
James had also been certain that Sirius would always just be around, the constant in his life. Best mates through everything, through all the crap life had thrown at them so far, through the death of his parents and of Regulus and whatever the kiss after that funeral had meant.
All James knows now is that he should have figured it out before he signed on for the tour, before Sirius realized that Remus was looking back, before they started skimping on meals so they could afford the occasional separate motel room. Before James learned just how thin those motel walls could be. Sirius is one wall away, and James pours himself another drink and ignores Peter's concern.
iii.
maybe one day soon
it'll all come out
how you dream about each other sometimes
When Remus was little, a neighbor girl came over to watch him while his parents were out, and they'd watch movies. They were the sort of movies Remus would never watch on his own, never think to, never dare to. Total girl movies, featuring a couple who is clearly meant to be together from the beginning, but they're both to silly to realize it.
Most of the time Remus thinks those sorts of stories are a load of rot, but sometimes when he's overtired he wonders if there's something to it, if there's a master plan, a director of his life. If Sirius really has been cast opposite him, if they've wanted each other all along, if everything they've said and done all along has been full of weight and meaning, and if they'll kiss before the end credits.
And then he tells himself to stop being such a girl as time and Sirius fall like rain through his hands.
iv.
you hypnotized me through your skin
it's where i wanna begin
you think like i do and that scares me
They came together like fireworks exploding in summer, shimmering light and smoke on the air. Peter either didn't notice or didn't care, and James drank until he couldn't notice much of anything.
Remus didn't need alcohol, though; he was drunk on the taste of Sirius's skin. The songwriter in him thought he should come up with something more original, but the rest of him suspected that originality was overrated. And then Sirius's fingers were digging into him and Sirius's mouth was on his cock and Remus couldn't think about much of anything.
They thought they had invented everything, that they way they touched was something new and beautiful, that they needed to try it all, show it all until they were drained and raw. Tension flowed from them, built up for ages, leaving them loose and lazy.
James pounded on the door, but they ignored him, lit cigarettes, and fell apart together.
v.
tell me will you make me sad or happy
and will you settle for love
will you settle for love
James hadn't wanted it to get out, but it had, as those things do. It had likely gotten out before it even happened, it was so inevitable. Peter said he didn't care as long as they were happy, and as it turned out, there was a certain segment of the female population that tended to appreciate certain propensities in musicians.
It was big at first, because it had to be. But now they are quieter. Remus still reads paperbacks in bed and gets up early to buy breakfast. Sirius still sleeps on the floor sometimes, and Remus throws a pillow at him so he doesn't fuck up his neck. They think of a version of themselves where they self-destruct, and they are content with this strange domesticity.
Sometimes the girls hold up signs asking them to kiss, and Remus wishes he'd kept Dana's number, just so he could leave her a message that says, "Thanks. It turned out okay after all."
:: soundtrack
"cathedrals" --jump, little children
"james!" --erin mckeown
"troubled times" --fountains of wayne
"fall apart with me" --the posies
"want" --rufus wainwright
yeah. an au of an au. give me meta or give me death. this is mostly because the UST was starting to get to me. poor, pretty boys. yeah, i know i wasn't suppose to be writing this. i think this was more for me than it was for you folks. unbetaed, and as it's now 5am i'm damned sure there are errors. so yell.
i.
in the cathedrals of new york and rome
there is a feeling you should just go home
and spend a lifetime finding out just where that is.
They've arrived in town earlier than expected, and the buildings cast shadows all around them. James and Peter cast longing eyes in the direction of the motel and a nap, but Sirius's leg has been jumping for the last hour, so Remus takes pity on him and suggests the two of them take a walk.
There's not much town to walk through, and perhaps inevitably they wind up at the cemetery. They make jokes about death and romance, and then about nothing at all. "We could go in for a minute." Remus hesitates. "Only if you like, of course."
A side door is unlocked and they slide into a back pew. The air is thick with incense and confession. "I broke it off with Patrick," Remus says softly, apropos of nothing. He is looking straight ahead. "Before the tour started. Because it wasn't right with him. Because it wasn't fair to make him wait." Because he wasn't you. Sirius doesn't say anything, doesn't look at him, just nods once. "I just thought you should know," Remus says, leaves everything else hanging in the air.
Almost without realizing it, they each reach across the smooth wood and lace their fingers together. The oil angels and glass saints look down on them. For now, for here, it is enough.
ii.
james!
c'mon hold your horses
the first kid under your nose ain't a sure thing
Okay, so, fine. James had taken Sirius for granted. He supposed. Either that or he had been watching too many made for tv movies. Or both, if he was even using the term "taken for granted" in the first place.
What was astonishing was how long it took him to notice. He should have seen it right from the beginning, how Sirius fucking glowed after he went to the hotel lounge on Peter's suggestion. No new band members could be all that exciting, James was certain.
James had also been certain that Sirius would always just be around, the constant in his life. Best mates through everything, through all the crap life had thrown at them so far, through the death of his parents and of Regulus and whatever the kiss after that funeral had meant.
All James knows now is that he should have figured it out before he signed on for the tour, before Sirius realized that Remus was looking back, before they started skimping on meals so they could afford the occasional separate motel room. Before James learned just how thin those motel walls could be. Sirius is one wall away, and James pours himself another drink and ignores Peter's concern.
iii.
maybe one day soon
it'll all come out
how you dream about each other sometimes
When Remus was little, a neighbor girl came over to watch him while his parents were out, and they'd watch movies. They were the sort of movies Remus would never watch on his own, never think to, never dare to. Total girl movies, featuring a couple who is clearly meant to be together from the beginning, but they're both to silly to realize it.
Most of the time Remus thinks those sorts of stories are a load of rot, but sometimes when he's overtired he wonders if there's something to it, if there's a master plan, a director of his life. If Sirius really has been cast opposite him, if they've wanted each other all along, if everything they've said and done all along has been full of weight and meaning, and if they'll kiss before the end credits.
And then he tells himself to stop being such a girl as time and Sirius fall like rain through his hands.
iv.
you hypnotized me through your skin
it's where i wanna begin
you think like i do and that scares me
They came together like fireworks exploding in summer, shimmering light and smoke on the air. Peter either didn't notice or didn't care, and James drank until he couldn't notice much of anything.
Remus didn't need alcohol, though; he was drunk on the taste of Sirius's skin. The songwriter in him thought he should come up with something more original, but the rest of him suspected that originality was overrated. And then Sirius's fingers were digging into him and Sirius's mouth was on his cock and Remus couldn't think about much of anything.
They thought they had invented everything, that they way they touched was something new and beautiful, that they needed to try it all, show it all until they were drained and raw. Tension flowed from them, built up for ages, leaving them loose and lazy.
James pounded on the door, but they ignored him, lit cigarettes, and fell apart together.
v.
tell me will you make me sad or happy
and will you settle for love
will you settle for love
James hadn't wanted it to get out, but it had, as those things do. It had likely gotten out before it even happened, it was so inevitable. Peter said he didn't care as long as they were happy, and as it turned out, there was a certain segment of the female population that tended to appreciate certain propensities in musicians.
It was big at first, because it had to be. But now they are quieter. Remus still reads paperbacks in bed and gets up early to buy breakfast. Sirius still sleeps on the floor sometimes, and Remus throws a pillow at him so he doesn't fuck up his neck. They think of a version of themselves where they self-destruct, and they are content with this strange domesticity.
Sometimes the girls hold up signs asking them to kiss, and Remus wishes he'd kept Dana's number, just so he could leave her a message that says, "Thanks. It turned out okay after all."
:: soundtrack
"cathedrals" --jump, little children
"james!" --erin mckeown
"troubled times" --fountains of wayne
"fall apart with me" --the posies
"want" --rufus wainwright
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Sirius fall like rain through his hands. is just beautiful.
and this Almost without realizing it, they each reach across the smooth wood and lace their fingers together. The oil angels and glass saints look down on them. For now, for here, it is enough. made me shiver, and it was beautiful and amber coloured, like it was through a glass of whiskey, or rain through coloured glass, and don't know if that makes sense, but right now I think I'm too tired to give feedback any more coherent than that...
*loves*
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That's almost all I can think of to say. It's just. I needed this. Needed something to carry me off to the happy place, make me forget myself to the point that it's a good thing I'm alone in the office, because I forgot I was here. I just forgot.
God. Thank you.
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i'm so glad! thank you :)
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I adore that line. wow.
I wish I could say more...but I'm just soaking in the characterizations. I might be here a while.
*hugs*
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thank you :)
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*checks fingers*
Still good! *soaks a bit more*
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The James one and They think of a version of themselves where they self-destruct, and they are content with this strange domesticity. and James pounded on the door, but they ignored him, lit cigarettes, and fell apart together. and all the lines in between and around them.
The UST there is killing me, too.
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[I'm sorry, I can't be more articulate than that at the moment. :)]
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\o\ \o/ /o/
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I loved the parts about being inevitable... and James drinking. Because... that's inevitable, too, methinks.
:)
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(i wish i wasn't on dial-up - i would have uploaded all of them for folkses)
*boogies*
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The UST gets to me, too. *G*
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(i'm hoping that by auing the au i've avoided stepping on the toes of the UST-loving original authors ;) )
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I was hoping someone would do something about that UST. (even if it is AU it still does that trick!)
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thank you!
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1) did you know that Jackie considers "Cathedrals" the Remus/Sirius song of MR? has she ever said that in a public forum? anyway, the tone of this first thing-that-never-happened just fits so perfectly with the song, somehow? i love the thought of Remus and Sirius in a church, i almost wrote a Christmas fic about them going to midnight mass, but i'd never have been able to make it as atmospheric and pretty as this. and the last line. just. <333
2) oh man, James POV. amazing. i love it when Jamie writes Peter POV, because it always teaches me something about the other boys that i didn't know before, because i'm used to writing MR with a Sirius or Remus slant? so hearing about them from James, with his jealousy and his tv movie phrases and his memories of Sirius, is so interesting. and Remus and Sirius "skimping on meals so they could afford the occasional separate motel room"? kalsjldf. best concept ever.
3) i say this every time you write something, but you know MR Remus so much better than i do, and i'm slightly jealous but mostly just thrilled! i like the thought of him sitting around with an older girl he maybe had sort of a crush on in flickery TV light, and keeping analogies from chick flicks in his head forever. he has that sort of long memory, i think. and wow. the last sentence here, too. beautiful rhythm.
4) this one is like poetry---They came together like fireworks exploding in summer, shimmering light and smoke on the air. and i'm sitting here and reading "They thought they had invented everything..." and just squirming. this is the sort of thing i'd be waving my hands around uselessly trying to explain if i was trying to tell someone about it, just how much sense it makes, what a vivid description of new love this is.
5) if i wanted to copy and paste my favourite bits of this one, i'd be reprinting the last two paragraphs. again, it just makes sense, that at first, it would be new and a big production and fireworks,
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anyway---i just love the thought that eventually, things would calm down again, that Sirius would still sleep on the floor. the idea of a strange, hotel-room domesticity is second only to the idea of girls holding signs asking them to kiss onstage, which makes me cackle with glee. uh, you know, since i'd definitely be in the sign-holding contingent, there.
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1) i did not know, not consciously anyway. in that, she might have said it, but i don't remember. i just love the song, and think of it as an s/r song in general, and so, yes.
and, you know, thank you so much! i always look forward to your feedback - it makes me go all a-squee :)
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Lovely. All of it, actually, is just amazing.
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But now that the poem is done, I can comment on this, and it is an incredibly beautiful fic. The writing has a tinge of unreality that leaves you breathless for more, and the story and imagery are simply breathtaking. Great story!
-Maria Rosenfire
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